Karaoké The Whole Being Dead Thing Beetlejuice (musical)

Hey, folks

Begging your pardon eh

'Scuse me

Sorry to barge in

Now let's skip the tears and start on the whole

You know

Being dead thing

You're doomed

Enjoy the singing

The sword of Damocles is swinging

And if I hear your cell phone ringing

I'll kill you myself

The whole being dead thing

Death can get a person stressed

We should have carpe'd way more diems

Now we're never gonna see 'em

I can show you what comes next

So don't be freaked

Stay in your seats

I do this bullshit like eight times a week

So just relax

You'll be fine

Drink your fifty dollar wine

And take a breath, huuuh

Welcome to a show about death

You're

You're gonna be fine on the other side

Die

You're all gonna die

You're all gonna die

I'll

I'll be your guide to the other side

Oh and full disclosure it's a show about death

Everybody gets on fine here

Like Rodgers, Hart and Hammerstein here

The women's bathroom has no line here

Just pee where you want

The whole being dead thing

You're just gonna love the folks here

Yeah I know you're woke but you can take a joke here

And every show I do like, a ton of coke here

The whole hhhhhh hah!

The whole being dead thing

Nobody is bullet-proof

I work out, I eat clean

Jesus, pass the

Dramamine

Time to face the brutal truth

'Cos we're all on a hit list

Might not live 'till Christmas

Choke to death on Triscuits

Hey, that's just statistics

So take a little break here

Kinda like a wake here

The scenery is fake here

But there's a giant snake here

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Welcome to a show about death

You're

You're gonna be fine

Thank you

On the other side

How you doin'?

Oh not good

Ba be ba be bo boo bap bop

I'll

Hey!

I'll be your guide to the other side

Seriously though this is a show about

Death is taboo but it's hardly something new

There's nothing medical professionals could do 'cept maybe just bill you

If you die while listening to this album

It's still gonna keep playing

There's no destiny or fate

Just a terrifying wait

Filled with people that you hate

And on a certain date the Universe kills you

That's the thing with life

No one makes it out alive

Toss that body in the pit

Gosh, it's awful, ain't it tragic

Blah-blah, Bible

Jesus magic

When you're dead who gives a shit

No pilates, no more yoga

Namaste you freakin' posers

From the cradle to cremation

Death just needs a little conversation

I have mastered the art of tearing convention apart

So how about we all make a start on the whole being dead thing

God I hope you're ready for a show about death