Karaoké High as F%#k Jon Lajoie

Have you ever watched the sun go down and you're thinkin' 'bout the world spinnin' 'round

Have you ever been high as fuck

You're in the bathroom mirror talkin' to yourself and your dog's lookin' at you like you need help

Have you ever been high as fuck

Then you feel your heart pumpin' really fast and you're convinced that you're gonna have a heart attack

Have you ever been high as fuck

You close your eyes and you're on a chicken farm

The only problem's that the chickens have human arms

You say That's fucked up

Why do the chickens have human arms

You need snacks so you walk to the corner store

But you're scared because you think that they will know you're high

So you walk around the block to buy some time

You finally decide to go in the store but you're so high you don't know why you're there anymore

So you just buy a pack of gum and get the hell out of there

You're walkin' home and your mouth is dry

You should've bought some juice and snacks but you were too high

Thinkin' about ketchup chips and for some reason the game Battleship

And you start thinkin' about how fun it was to play games like Battleship when you were a kid

And how as we get older we forget how to play and just to enjoy ourselves

So you say Guess what

I'm gonna make up a game right now

And it involves a baseball bat and a porcupine and I'm gonna try to kill a porcupine with a baseball bat

But then you don't know where to find a porcupine so you go on eBay and you do a search

But people don't sell porcupines on the internet

And you say You know what world

You've got me cornered again

I'm gonna roll another joint

You ever eat a whole bag of crackers that were so old that they weren't crispy anymore

Have you ever been high as fuck