Karaoké Rappin' Rodney (I Can't Take it Anymore) Rodney Dangerfield

I tell ya I'm alright now but last week I was in rough shape

But I don't get a break with nothin'

I played hide and seek when I was three

Why they couldn't even look for me

I was an ugly kid

I never had fun

They put me through a dog show and I won

When I was born

I brought no joy

My old man said he wanted a boy

I was an ugly kid always alone

Halloween I had to trick or treat over the phone

Friends don't call

My phone don't ring

I don't get a break with anything

Ah death where is my sting

I'm getting old it's hard to face

Well during sex

I lose my place

Steak and sex my favorite pair

I have 'em both the same way very rare

I know I'm old

I could go any minute

I got a kidney shaped pool with a stone in it

Mmh doctor Vinnie Boombah that's another one

I said I wanted to stop aging he gave me a gun

I told him I got water on the knee

He gave me a sponge and raised his fee

Ah it ain't easy bein' me

Mmh nothin' goes right

I just can't fight it

Well eastern airlines thanked me for flying united

I got some money

What did I do?

I bought some quicksand the deal fell through

My car broke down

I called Triple A

They left the car and towed me away

I can't take it no more

I'm getting too old

I called suicide prevention they put me on hold

Winter summer spring and fall

I'm always up against the wall ah I don't get no respect at all

It's getting worse it's caving in the happiness I can't take it no more it's all over

Hey where are my kids?

Somebody help me

Hey bartender

Hey who's that guy with my daughter?

Where's my wallet?

How do I get out of here?