Karaoké Man The Full Monty (Patrick Wilson & John Ellison Conlee)

You're out of work

Your pride is missin'

They call you jerk but you don't listen

You haven't got a pot to piss in

But you're a man

Your hands are rough

Your back is hairy

Your talk is tough

Your smell is scary

Here's what you're not

You're not a fairy

No, you're a beer-drinking real live man

And when the beef comes out you do the carvin'

You hate Tom Cruise but you love Lee Marvin

You're a man and that's a bonus

'Cos when you're swinging your cojones

You'll show 'em what testosterone is

'Cos you're a boot-wearin' beer-drinking

Chevy-driving man

Don't do it to be the most talked-about man in Buffalo

Don't do it for all the money you're gonna rake in

Don't even do it so your best friend can keep seeing his son whom he loves more than life

Oh no

Do it for yourself, Davie-boy

Show yourself the stuff you're made of

Don't show me

You get these plans they always fail

You've been divorced

You've been to jail

You may be bold

You may be male

But you're a bum bum ba dum bum

You got your dreams

You got your wishes

And I don't want to sound malicious

But you're a nut and I got dishes

I'm going home

See ya'

You walk away now but you'll be back

You know you're always there for me

Not this time Fabio

Jerry the Stripper

Surf's up ladies

Here comes Lukowski the big Kahuna

Riding your pipeline

I'm hanging ten

Stand back ladies it's quarterback Jerry throwing a long ball right into your end zone

Touchdown

Wanna go for two?

Bases loaded

It's bad boy Jerry swinging a big, big ol' bat

B-b-b-banging one right at you baby

Booya

I'm gonna jump straight up kick a hole in the moon

Don't know exactly where I'm going but I know I'm gonna get there soon

I'll show you

I'll show them all

I'll show them all the real thing

What is a man?

Why does he bother?

'Cos he's a man

'Cos he's a father

He wants his kid

He wants his life

He wants to ba da da da da da da da

He wants to be a man a real man, yes I am

I'm gonna be

I've gotta be

A real man with a mission like you see on television

I'm a real fine genuine man

Ba da da da da