Karaoké Hardware Store Weird Al Yankovic

Nothin' ever happens in this town

Feelin' low down

Not a lot to do around here

I thought that I would go right out of my mind until a friend told me the news

He said

You know that vacant lot right beside the gas station well somebody bought it

And on that spot they're gonna build a shop where we can go buy bolts and screws

Since then

I've been walkin' on air

I can barely brush my teeth or comb my hair

'Cos I'm so excited and I really don't care

I've been waitin' since last June

For this day to finally arrive

I'm so happy now just to be alive

'Cos any minute now

I'm gonna be inside

Well I hope they open soon

I can't wait no

I can't wait

When are they gonna open up that door

I'm goin', yes I'm goin'

Imma goin' to the, goin' to the

Ware, I'm goin', really goin' to the

Goin', I'm goin' to the

Yes I'm goin' to the hardware store

In my sleepin' bag

I camped out overnight right in front of the store then as soon as it was light out

I pressed my nose right up against the glass

You know I had to be first in line

Gonna get me a flashlight and a broom

Want a pair of pliers for every single room of my house

See those hacksaws

Very, very soon one of them will be all mine

Guys with nametags walkin' down the aisles

Rows of garden hoses that go on for miles and miles

Brand new socket wrenches in a plethora of styles

All arranged alphabetically

And they're doin' a promotional stunt

There's a great big purple sign out front that says

Every twenty-seventh customer will get a ball peen hammer free

I can't wait no

I can't wait

When are they gonna open up that door

I'm goin', yes I'm goin'

Imma goin' to the, goin' to the

Ware, I'm goin', really goin' to the

Goin', I'm goin' to the

Yes I'm goin' to the hardware store

I'm goin', yes I'm goin'

Imma goin' to the, goin' to the

Ware, I'm goin', really goin' to the

Goin', I'm goin' to the

Yes I'm goin' to the hardware store

Ahh

Would you look at all that stuff

They've got Allen wrenches

Gerbil feeders

Toilet seats, electric heaters

Trash compactors, juice extractors

Shower rods and water meters

Walkie-talkies, copper wires

Safety goggles, radial tires

BB pellets, rubber mallets

Fans and dehumidifiers

Picture hangers, paper cutters

Waffle irons, window shutters

Paint removers, window louvers

Maskin' tape and plastic gutters

Kitchen faucets, foldin' tables

Weather strippin', jumper cables

Hooks and tackle

Grout and spackle

Power foggers, spoons and ladles

Pesticides for fumigation

High-performance lubrication

Metal roofin', waterproofin'

Multi-purpose insulation

Air compressors, brass connectors

Wreckin' chisels, smoke detectors

Tire gauges, hamster cages

Thermostats and bug deflectors

Trailer hitch demagnetizers

Automatic circumcisers

Tennis rackets, angle brackets

Duracells and Energizers

Soffit panels, circuit breakers

Vacuum cleaners, coffee makers

Calculators, generators

Matchin' salt and pepper shakers

I can't wait no

I can't wait

When are they gonna open up that door

I'm goin', yes I'm goin'

Imma goin' to the, goin' to the

Ware, I'm goin', really goin' to the

Goin', I'm goin' to the

Yes I'm goin' to the hardware store

I'm goin', yes I'm goin'

Imma goin' to the, goin' to the

Ware, I'm goin', really goin' to the

Goin', I'm goin' to the

Yes I'm goin' to the hardware store

I'm goin', yes I'm goin'

Imma goin' to the, goin' to the

Ware, I'm goin', really goin' to the

Goin', I'm goin' to the

Yes I'm goin' to the hardware store